Month: May 2014

50 Fucking Pushups

Yeah, I do fifty fucking push-ups every night….for you, my love.

*BIG SMILE*

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Biblical Mania

I know I’m manic right now but I’m pretty sure that if there were psychiatrists and the DSM-IV available in Jerusalem from…what? Like 2 or 3 thousand years before Christ was born until he died… many Bible dudes wouldn’t have been prophets and martyrs….just literally “crazy folks” and that’s it…Jeremiah, Ezekiel, Amos, Zechariah, Isaiah, Enoch, Matthew, Mark, Luke and John….Jesus?

Haha, Samuel heard voices and Jacob didn’t just hear them, he wrestled with apparitions only he could see … Moses hallucinated and Noah just stayed drunk and built huge ships with Divinely Inspired specific dimensions and supplies.

Um…what if your neighbor was Noah…just chilling in his yard for over 100 years drunk as shit, building a fucking ark to God-given specifications….

Don’t fucking tell me you wouldn’t make fun of him at the least, and call the city on him, eventually…don’t tell me that.

I believe in God. I always have, it’s been in me….always there, even when I knew zero about it.

I did get saved….and it was a life-changing crazy experience which I shall write about later….

However, Christians have turned me away. Yes….”christians”…..

And now, it is my goal to teach people UNCONDITIONAL LOVE….cause that’s all there is that’s gonna save us, at this point.

Stop being hypocrites, church folks….it’s not what Jesus would do.

In fact, if you’ll just read your Bible closely, and perhaps have a Greek-English-Hebrew, interlinear Bible, but that’s not even necessary cause it’s plain as day in John 8:44….you can see where Jesus basically tells all the hypocrites their mom fucked the devil.

The hypocrites were the only ones Jesus was an ass to….

…and in my humble opinion, to the deference of plenty of theologians….I believe THAT IS WHY Jesus rode a BABY donkey to his crucifixion.

A BABY ASS

Money Talks and Bullshit Walks

My dog is currently in one of my refrigerators.  

Thank God, I have three refrigerators.  

Coco must be buried tomorrow.

My baby girls kindergarten graduation was this morning and I didn’t go.

I feel like such an awful failure.

I just couldn’t….I couldn’t go….I have been crying non-stop for almost three days and my face looks like I was attacked by bees and then beat up…..I suppose beat up by someone who doesn’t like bees.

I wanted to go, I had planned to go, but I haven’t seen my children in a couple months because my ex-husband, who has full custody of my children will not let my children come to my house because I have a roommate that he does not know.

I feel like this is something I should not speak of, for fear my ex-husband will deny me my children until they turn old enough to speak on behalf of themselves.

I DO NOT FUCKING CARE ANYMORE.  HE FUCKED ME OVER AND I WILL WRITE.

I RAISED MY CHILDREN, ALL BY MYSELF UNTIL THE YOUNGEST ONE WAS POTTY-TRAINED AND THEN HE TOOK THEM.

To be fair, he wouldn’t have taken them if I had not divorced him.

To be fair, I loved my ex-husband with my whole heart and soul and he never loved me back and there comes a point, at which, A WIFE NEEDS THE LOVE AND ATTENTION OF HER HUSBAND.

I never got that from him.

He was very good about supplying any and all of our financial needs, but more than incapable of responding to any of my emotional needs.  He never loved me.

We were married in 2006, after I had our first child, and became pregnant with our second child.  The second child was born in 2007 and then we had one more in 2008.

My husband was almost never home, and when he did come home it was always after midnight.  Sometimes he didn’t come home until four in the morning.

I was there raising our very small children, by myself. 

There was no help.  NONE.  NO FUCKING HELP.

I have no family and his family are very religious and since I am a “wrong side of the tracks girl”, they never approved of me and hated me from day one.  

Unfortunately, at that time, his family ran the biggest company in their small town.

That’s how he beat me in court.

MONEY TALKS AND BULLSHIT WALKS.

That’s all I want to say about this right now.