I am about to apply these faux nails and while I am super-excited thinking about how all of the different ways I will be able to colorfully paint these luscious claws, I realize I should
write type my post before the application.
I have been thinking all weekend about the subject matter of this post. I have made several random notes in the “action memos” section of my Note 3. This is my fourth note and I just started utilizing the “action memo” feature. I mainly got the phone for the big screen.
I have 20/20 vision.
Yeah, haters, I have 20/20 in my backofthehead eyes, too.
I was employing shorthand, I suppose.
Was I drunk when I wrote them?
I am feeling lazy today, and I am also in a pretty outstanding mood, so I am going to keep this short and sweet.
Or…at least I am going to try.
My Mimi was very superstitious and she taught me to be very superstitious. I remember going to the corner grocery store with my grandmother. Upon walking into the building, we would always pass two sets of Fica trees planted neatly in boxes made of red brick. Each box was about six feet long and four feet wide.
Like most children, I would immediately jump upon the brick and walk one side of the box as if I were a gymnast on the balance beam. It was all good until I would choose to jump and do my walk on the side of the box opposite to the side Mimi was walking.
OH HELL, NO!
Mimi would IMMEDIATELY say, “BREAD AND BUTTER!!!!!!”
I knew what I was supposed to say and on most days I would make her happy by responding with an equal, “BREAD AND BUTTER!!!!!!”
Mimi said if I was ever walking with someone I loved and we should happen to pass something that would come between us, and if we let it come between us, I should always say, “bread and butter”, as well as the person with whom I was walking, so that nothing would really come between us.
Mimi cooked a bunch and I would watch her. Unfortunately, I wasn’t watching her to learn how to cook, though she did manage to teach me to cook. I watched her because I loved her more than anything in the world and I just wanted to be where she was.
At some point during the preparation of the meal, Mimi would invariably spill the salt. When this happened, she would immediately take the salt shaker into her and shake salt onto the floor over her LEFT SHOULDER.
Otherwise…..well….we don’t want to know, now do we?
I don’t believe that, even to this day, I have spilled salt randomly then neglected to purposefully throw it onto the floor, OVER MY LEFT SHOULDER.
I have many more anecdotes like this one, about my beloved Mimi, but your attention span is short and so is mine and now I’m ready to do m’nails.
I love you.