Who Woulda Thought?


So…I am a recovering people-pleaser.

Maybe I go a little over-board unpleasing people since I figured out what a huge people-pleaser I am.

I do things 100%

It’s 11:00 p.m. and the neighbors dog is going berserk.  I can hear this mf through my loud-ass headphones.

I’m drunk.

I’m like, “fuck this shit”, I’m going to this dude’s house to tell him I’m about to kill his fucking dog.

I take my 10-year old  son with me for back-up.

I knock three times in rapid succession.

In less than 15 seconds, dude answers the door and I’m all like ‘Goodfellas’ at this chump’s door.

Turns out the chump isn’t a chump, he’s actually really nice and we talked for 20 minutes at ten to midnight.

Who woulda thought?

I still get really irritated when the neighbors say they’ve never heard a bad word about me, cause that’s a fucking lie and they know it.



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